Our latest shirt is available now and it’s pretty awesome! It’s Thor – the God of hammering shit. An all-round awesome guy, not only is Thor a god and has a hammer, he also kills robots and ice-people and gets to kiss Natalie Portman.
Why would you want to buy a THOR T-SHIRT I hear your puny human voice ask? Here’s some awesome facts:
- Fact: Thor once drank a 40oz slushie in 12 seconds and didn’t even get a brain-freeze.
- Fact: Thor once came to earth disguised as a black man and recorded the song “U Can’t Touch This”.
- Fact: Thor has 3 penises, all of which look like Ted Danson.
- Fact: Thor once beat a lump of granite in a staring competition.
These are just a few of the things we know about Thor and his amazing life of drinking with Vikings and fighting pretty much anything that moved (and some things that didn’t).
With his mighty hammer Mjolnir he rained down thunder upon his enemies, an act which itself is badass enough to warrant a t-shirt with his face on it.
Wearing this shirt automatically makes you the alpha male of your tribe. I wore it around the house and now my wife is pregnant and my neighbours became incontestably more attractive. Also, someone left a 6-pack in my fridge after a party and gave my cat an awesome haircut. Because of the shirt, no doubt.
So what are you waiting for human? Stop praying to the Gods and start wearing the Gods on your chest. So buy this shirt now and show everyone you’re the boss (not Tony Danza).
So the question now isn’t “why would you want to buy one” – it’s “why the f**k haven’t you bought one yet? Are you crazy? This guy has a hammer and kills robots!!! Am I not making my self clear!”